in this issue
Hello from Japan
As some of you have heard, I'm spending a month in
Japan visiting my girlfriend. So far it's been a lot of fun.
At first it was a bit of culture shock, but now I'm
getting used to being here.
Thanks to technology, I've been in touch with some of
you via email. I've also been able to coach from here
because the long distance is very cheap.
I'll be posting pictures on my website from time to time,
so have a look at the 'Travels' section at some point. I
hope you enjoy these shots.
Find out more....
Quick Links...
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Dear Robert,
I hope that wherever you are reading this the wheather
is begining to heat up. In this issue, I'll be exploring
how people draw conclusions from many of the
experiences they have.
Enjoy!,
Rob
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Keeping Score
When I was a kid, I would go and shoot baskets from
time to time. I wasn't particularly good at this as far
as I could tell. There was a period of a few weeks
when I would go out and shoot every afternoon.
Although not too many balls actually made their way
into the net, I had visions of some day being a great
player. After several weeks, I noticed that I didn't
seem to be improving. On my intramural basketball
team, there were several games when the coach
didn't
really put me in. I didn't take this as the best news.
Later that year, I tried out for the junior high basketball
team and was cut after several tryouts. That was it. I
realized that I wasn't a good basketball player, and
that I could never improve.Now all of this may be
true, but when I drew this conclusion, I stopped
playing. It didn't occur to me that I could enjoy hours
of playing with friends and such. What strikes me now
is that as bad as I was at basketball, I was probably
worse at keeping score. I realize now, that a few bad
experiences don't 'mean' anything. It doesn't
mean
that I'm a bad player. A few days without noticing
improvement doesn't mean that you can't improve.
It
may mean that you're not noticing it. I realize now
that being bad at something doesn't mean that you
have to stop at it, or that you'll always be bad. The
way you keep score can open or close great
possibilities for you.
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A few ways to play with keeping score:
What are you comparing yourself to? Are you
comparing yourself to someone else? If you're making a
self to self comparison, are you comparing yourself to
you in the past, or you in the future?How often do
you check? There's the expression 'a watched pot
never boils.' The way this plays out in learning
something is that if you're checking too often, you
may not notice tiny improvements that add up over
time. Adjust how often you check in with
something. Watch the meaning you attribute to
things. People draw conclusions about themselves and
life all the time from the smallest amounts of data. It's
ok to draw conclusions, but it's good to keep in mind
that most of these are partially true at best, and that
most conclusions can change over time. Whether I
decide I'm good or bad at something, I'm probably
right. I like to draw conclusions that open possibilities
for myself, and that get me to try things in the
world. Epilog:
Years later, I started shooting foul shots again. I was
able to hit 6 or 7 out of 10 most of the time. I wanted
to see if I could train myself to hit 10 for 10. I had
heard that certain players had a harder time missing
than hitting. I stuck it out for a few weeks, and hit 13
for 13 twice in a row.
Another interesting tidbit: I found out a few years
ago that Michael Jordan didn't make his highschool
basketball team. I'm glad he kept
playing.
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Institute for Life Purpose
The Institute for Life Purpose is moving forward as
usual. We're working on some new projects such as our
forthcoming newsletter. We've also been joined by
some new members which is wonderful.
If you or anyone you know is interested or would like to
get involved, please visit our site or feel free to shoot
me an email.
ILP »
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Question of the Month
What was a time when somebody said something to
you, and the way you thought changed from that point
on? I'm collecting stories for an upcoming project.
Please send me an email with your answers and let me
know if I can include it in an upcoming newsletter.
Rob@todaycoach.com
That's all for now. Wishing you all a great month!
Rob
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